Dear Sister Cahoon,
I have a question on a subject that has bothered me. Around the first of this year my Relief Society president assigned me the “mailing list”. I was told to mail a photocopy of the Ensign message to about 20 less active or not active members in our branch and I am told to mark them as visited every month when they count up the visits. I do not feel right about this. I talked to the Relief Society president and she said ‘we have always done it this way’. I talked with my Branch President and he said that it was her call. I have even prayed about this and I am still troubled. I do not feel that I am doing visiting teaching by mailing a photocopied page out of the Ensign. I am fairly new to the church. Is this something that happens commonly? Or is this something I may need to speak with stake leaders about?
Jennifer
How wonderful that you have a testimony to share and a desire to magnify your assignment! Let me offer a few thoughts about the questions you’ve raised.
In my experience, the bulletin route is a standard phenomenon in the Church. I, too, was surprised when I first learned about this method for reaching the sisters. Only as I have worked very closely with all aspects of the visiting teaching program have I have come to appreciate that the bulletin route is necessary and effective if used properly.
Some sisters are unwilling to accept a telephone call or a personal visit from a member of the Church, but will accept a mailer. In those cases, using the bulletin to deliver a spiritually uplifting message is a great blessing. I’ve also seen the bulletin route utilized as a temporary stopping spot for new move-ins. New sisters remain on this list for the first month or two, until the Relief Society Presidency can visit each personally and then assign visiting teachers. The mailing should include the names and telephone numbers of the bishop/branch president and Relief Society president, the meeting schedule (including Home, Family, and Personal Enrichment meeting), and the location of the meetinghouse. This ensures that sisters receiving the bulletin have phone numbers in hand and know whom to call if they have a need, and that they know when meetings are held and where the church building is located. In the case of the less-active sister, it is essential she receive this information regularly so it is readily available should she have a change of heart and decide to initiate contact.
I think the crux of your question is whether a mailed bulletin is a legitimate form of contact. Your Relief Society president and branch president are both comfortable with meeting the needs of the sisters in this way, and it is their stewardship to make that determination. In my experience, sisters should be on the bulletin list for an extended period of time ONLY when they will not accept visits or telephone calls. Forcing a visiting teacher upon such a sister will only drive her further away. In that situation, counting the bulletin as a contact is acceptable. If you know of a sister on the bulletin route who would accept a visiting teacher, raise your specific concern with the Relief Society president. Sisters assigned to the bulletin route should be contacted personally at least once or twice a year or as determined appropriate by the bishop/branch president and/or Relief Society president. Over time, needs develop and circumstances change, and it may be that a visit will become acceptable where it was not in the past.
You have the privilege and responsibility of being the only source of church contact for the group of sisters you are assigned, and even with the limitations, you can make a difference in their lives. All of us need to know someone loves us and cares about us, even if we apparently do not want that attention and concern. Pray for each sister on your route individually. Include a short personal note and your telephone number when you mail the bulletin. Send a birthday card. In everything you send, express your testimony. You just might be the source of love and example of faith that makes one of the sisters wonder if she might want to return to church after all.
I promise that as you pray to know how to serve these sisters, and as you seek to sustain your leaders by following their direction, your troubled feelings will be replaced by peace, and you will find this service gratifying. I am grateful you have a desire to serve, and I know you will be blessed with a stronger testimony as you do so.
Sister Cahoon
Posted by John in Visiting Teaching, Ask Sister Cahoon